Content warning: mention of sexual assault
I wrote a post awhile ago about consent in the rehearsal room and my experience in college directing intimate scenes for my thesis play. This post is a companion piece and talks about consent in middle and high school productions.
In order to not place pressure on underage students, I argue that kissing scenes should not be allowed in middle and high school productions. Though I am sure the majority of drama teachers ask their students if they feel comfortable kissing their fellow actor on stage, I am arguing that it should not even be an option, and that onstage kisses should not be allowed in middle and high school productions.
When I was in eighth grade, my middle school's musical involved the main actors having to kiss. Other students learned that one of the actors never had their first kiss before. I remember feeling badly for this fellow student because this was most likely not how they pictured their first kiss. They would now have to share this first in front of a bunch of middle schoolers, at an age where everyone is self-conscious. The same goes for high school students. If a student does not want their first kiss to be on stage, that is completely fair and should be respected. Students should also obviously not have to divulge whether this would be their first kiss or not, as they could be teased for it. A clear “no” should be reason enough.
You may be asking yourself, “But isn’t it okay if both students give their consent?”. I agree that asking students for their consent is vital; however, I believe that kissing should not even be an option. Let us say that a drama teacher asks their students if they are alright with kissing one another. Person A is perfectly fine with it and gives their consent, but Person B is not okay with it. Person B may not want to kiss Person A for many reasons, such as they do not feel comfortable kissing someone on stage. At a particularly young age where students are judged, Person B may feel pressured to kiss their fellow actor and say yes even when they do not mean it. We are therefore putting a student in an uncomfortable situation where they are pressured to do something they do not consent to. This is a question that can also not be asked anonymously, as it would be easy to figure out who said no, as the one who says yes would know that the other said no. If a student does say no, they may be subject to ridicule by their peers.
Let us also remember that most schools would need a parent/guardian’s signature to allow the student to even act in the play. How can we ask mostly underage students to kiss one another when they still need an adult’s permission to act in their school’s production? We cannot expect a high school student to feel comfortable enough to say no to a kissing scene as a legal adult would. Actors of a legal age have trouble enough saying no.
In the film Last Tango in Paris, actress Maria Schneider did not know that she could have said no to the direction of the rape scene Marlon Brando and Bernardo Bertolucci came up with on the spot. She said: “...you can’t force someone to do something that isn’t in the script, but at the time, I didn’t know that”. She was nineteen and forced to do a scene without her consent. Though intimacy directors are bringing consent into the rehearsal room, there are many situations where actors are pressured to do things they do not want to do. If consent in the rehearsal room is still unclear in the professional sphere, how can we expect underage students to fully understand consent in school productions? (This of course brings in the larger issue of sex education in our school systems).
Some may say that it is only acting and the student should not have accepted the role if they did not feel comfortable kissing on stage. These are students though, not professional actors. Also, professional or not, no one should not get a role because they do not want to kiss someone.
There are many reasons why a student may not want to kiss a fellow actor, and we really need to keep in mind students who have experienced sexual assault. Kissing could be a triggering experience, and they should not be put in a situation where they are asked to kiss someone on stage. Even if a student is fine with it, a situation should not be created for a student who is not fine with it.
In conclusion, kissing scenes in middle and high school productions should not be allowed. These scenes should instead be reworked so that students do not kiss. We should not be putting pressure on underage students for the multitude of reasons why one may not want to share an onstage kiss. No one should ever be pressured to do something they do not want to do. Consent in the rehearsal room is vital.
*Shout out to all the amazing intimacy directors who are having open conversations with actors and making everyone feel safe and comfortable!*
February 26, 2021
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